we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
