I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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