yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
