he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
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