That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Randomize
