i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
