You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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