can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
