So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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