Whoa Z and x make the same sound
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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