I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
