and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
