So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
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