Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Randomize
