okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
