imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
