I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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