you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
