uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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