question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Randomize
