He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
We had to coat check the pizza.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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