and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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