Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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