Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
