She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
