So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
