real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Randomize
