I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
