Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
