Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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