As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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