some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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