so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
