I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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