WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Randomize
