Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Randomize
