last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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