Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
