Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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