i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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