Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
