I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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