The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize