i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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