arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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