You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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