so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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