Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
