wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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