can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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