Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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