i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
