At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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